Very cool. Two comments: first, there is a Polish saying, "Not my circus, not my monkeys," that makes me smile. And secondly, own your stuff by speaking in the first person. None of this "you didn't..." Phil
The idea of expecting someone else to fix it for us resonates with me, and something I’ve only come to realize in the last few years is part of my white male privilege. Gotta do better to be better.
Yes, my ex-husband thought his anger was my responsibility to manage. I was smart enough to tell him it wasn't my job to fix it. He had to figure it out himself. He's mellowed a lot with age but he's never taken any responsibility for his actions -- or at least never expressed it to me. But I've recovered. I'm smarter. I picked a better partner. All is well.
Very cool. Two comments: first, there is a Polish saying, "Not my circus, not my monkeys," that makes me smile. And secondly, own your stuff by speaking in the first person. None of this "you didn't..." Phil
Thank you, Justin, I enjoyed reading this.
The idea of expecting someone else to fix it for us resonates with me, and something I’ve only come to realize in the last few years is part of my white male privilege. Gotta do better to be better.
Thank you, Roger! It only took me 50+ years to figure it out. 😏 The residue of trauma combined with the glacial grip of patriarchy
Sounds familiar. I keep telling myself at least it’s better to arrive here at 50+ years vs 60+
Such useful reminders and examples. Thank you.
💞
Excellent …. Many people should heed your words.
Yes, my ex-husband thought his anger was my responsibility to manage. I was smart enough to tell him it wasn't my job to fix it. He had to figure it out himself. He's mellowed a lot with age but he's never taken any responsibility for his actions -- or at least never expressed it to me. But I've recovered. I'm smarter. I picked a better partner. All is well.